Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?