Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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