Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
