Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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