literally had 100 drinks last night.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
