Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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