i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
