Don't you send me to vm
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
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