clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
