you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
from now on my penis is your penis
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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