i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
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My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
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I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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