i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You are a genius and a whore.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
