so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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