When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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