Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
