Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize