she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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