meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
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my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
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I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.