you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.