You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
