The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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