Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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