He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
do herpes really smell.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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