READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
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