we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
