i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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