At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I think I just shit out all my problems.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
