They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.