Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
This house was built for laser tag.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
