the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
