Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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