Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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