Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize