roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
