Having a random hookup so left but love u
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
