We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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