I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
We were destined to go to rehab together
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
