Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Redeem this text for a blowjob
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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