Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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