i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
