there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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