As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
