apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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