The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize