Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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