Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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