I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize