Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
