I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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