So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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