the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
