HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Randomize
